mithen

“This can't be Mordor,” “It's... pretty.”

LOL

“food that fuels Sauron's armies”

I had been wondering about that, you know. In the films it is shown as a desolate, destroyed land but even Orcs need to eat. I don't even think you could satisfy that demand by raids alone. In some fic Orcs are shown to be cannibalistic almost, but your version makes much more sense.

Black Numernorans

See, here my knowledge of canon is shown to be lacking again. Are they a canon thing or another of your marvellous inventions?

Gimli calling Denethor “lad” is all kinds of wonderful. As is reading a fic with a fellowship in the first year without LoR or a Hobbt film to brighten the winter. *sigh*

“No, not though you flay me, or crush my hands, or boil me in tallow, or eat me alive from the feet up--”

Jeesh, 5000 years of propaganda really did a number on the people...

“bound by unclean oaths to fulfill all their evil lusts and--”

O M G. One half of my brain is trying not to laugh. And the other half would like to go in directions that tell me I have spent way too much time of my fandom life on kinkmemes. *ahem *

So many wonderful words! vainglorious seatwarmer pompous windbag I feel as in a Shakespeare play...

with apologies to the bard – a silly poem

To read fic, or not to read: that is the question:
whether t'is nobler in the mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous canon,
Or to take arms against a sea of inconsistent writing,
and by reading end that. To read, to imagine,
no more; and by a fic to say we end
the heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That fannish life is heir to; 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To read, to imagine;
To read: perchance to feel: Aye there's the rub
For in that state of reading what feelings may come
when we have shuffled off the daily grind,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long waiting;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The movie director's wrong, the producer's contumely,
the pangs of ruined OTPs, the new season's delay,
The insolence of Mary Sues and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When we ourself might our feels make
with a bare fic? Who would trolls bear,
To grunt and sweat under second rate canon,
But that the dread of something after reading,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn
no traveller returns unchanged, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than to fly to others that we know not of?
Thus imagination makes cowards of us all;
and thus the native hue of resolution is
is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And fic of great word count and sideplots
with this regard are put aside
and never are read through.

-------------------------------------------------
“beyond the safety of Mordor”

Good Eru! - But again what a brilliant idea! Of course Sauron could not use violence as his only strategy. Valar! I keep forgetting how he started out, all snivelling, secrety manipulation.

Oh and what a wonderful image to end this chapter: “ a sudden spot of light … like a poisonous flower” *fingers itch to draw this grr*

[I've been riding the train home for seven hours and this is finally the time when I can read this chapter in peace, sorry it took so long!]